These last few days all I have done is packing,sorting, packing and more sorting. And all the while there are a thousand thoughts in my mind. I have a couple posts in draft and countless others in my mind,but this one needs to be written.
I had a followup appointment at my doctor’s office today and we all were happy to get away from this mad place we call home. I tell you, there is so much mess- well, actually not mess.its our things- clothes,books, etc..but in general moves are messy and to add to it, we are trying to pack a week long vacation in SFO, before we leave the U S of A. So, anyway, we were at the doctor’s office.
The doctor’s assitant came in to take all the details,Aadya was happily chattering ,saying hi giving hi-fives..till, she started checking my temperature and blood pressure and then,all the love evaporated .Sanj tried to distract her, but all she wanted to do was pry the pressure cuff off my arm. That got done and then we had to wait for the doctor. This is the only bad part about my doctor visit. She is great doctor, patiently answers all our queries but,the wait time is too long.So,thats a challenge,keeping a super-active toddler out of trouble. Sanj took her out for a walk and still no sign of the doctor.. after a long wait I think about 25 minutes or so..she came to see me.
“You are glowing,you seem to have lost weight”…these were her first words,on entering the room.Grinning ear-to-ear,I forgot about the long wait. When your doctor tells you, you are looking good,its a cause to celebrate. The next she asked Sanj ,if he had had his flu shots.When he told her that his sugar levels were back to normal,she reached out and hugged him. This is the reason, why I still keep going back to this place.. they make us feel like we belong. Anyway
then came the tricky part- the blood draw.
Its so difficult a good vein in my arms,and so as soon as the nurse came in to take the blood, sanj took aadya out .They came back,and we were still trying to find a vein after one missed attempt.Aadya saw the band-aid and started pointing at it saying “Boo Boo” with a sad face.I said, “Mumma has got a boo” she looked even sadder.I said, can you make it better?
And she did..She climbed up on the chair and kissed the band-aid and then asked me..”boo?”I said,with a sad face,Boo hurts.She climbed up on the chair and kissed it again and kissed my hand and face too.How could the Boo not get better then?
I hugged her and said,its Ok now,baby..then she smiled. The nurse hugged her too..and said..”see that’s why I wanted atleast one little girl”..What can I say,I got lucky!
So, if you want to make your boo better,you know where to go 🙂
Category: Tales from Aadyaland
17 months and counting….
Can you believe it?? In another month,my baby girl would be one and a half years old.Aadya turned 17 months young,over the weekend I completely forgot about the 16 month post..and so,this one has to be written.Co-incidentally,Aadya was sick on both her 16 month and 17th month birthday.My poor baby has fever since yesterday and her cold and cough doesn’t seem to be going away.
She has evolved so much in these last two months.She is getting more and more communicative.She knows how to effectively use pointing and words. If she wants something,she drags us by the hand, and points at the thing that she wants. If she wants to watch TV, she points at it.That’s another story,that she turns it off,when we are watching it and not paying attention to her. She knows that her favorite song,Lakdi ki kathi can be watched on the computer,so she points at the computer,when she wants to listen to that. She points at the fridge when she wants milk or fruit. If she wants milk,she brings her sippy cup to us!
And she is trying to say so many words.Whatever you say,she has to repeat it or try to repeat it. She is a big copy-cat. She is seen walking around,with the phone propped between her shoulder and neck.Obviously,why not? That is how mamma holds the phone! The keys on the keyboard have to be typed at furiously..not slowly,not one by one.Her fingers even imitate mine. The food is to be eaten with a spoon or fork. She waits patiently for the spoon if I forget to give it to her.
And the funniest is when she tries to laugh. Its so cute.When we are laughing,she crinkles up her nose and pretends to laugh.And she always has to have the last laugh!!She won’t quit till the last person has stopped laughing!
She likes to choose her own clothes.So,I lay out two outfits for her and let her pick one. She things she has done something great and happily lets me dress her.If she doesn’t like what she is wearing,she just takes it off. No one told me how your work increases ten fold,when your child learns to undress herself.And God!how she hates her diapers. She just doesn’t want to keep it on.The moment she pees,she takes it off and gives it to me. In a way its good.I know she is ready to be Potty trained..but, with this move and everything else that goes with it,I don’t want to start potty training her. Anyway,she now,points at the bathroom and wants me to take off her diaper,when she wants to pee,which is another sign that she is ready!
This last month,has been great for the father-daughter duo. Aadi is getting more and more attached to her dad. Earlier,she would play with him,but when it was time to sleep or if she was hungry,she needed only mumma. But now, sometimes,she goes to her Papa. And falls asleep as soon as he picks her up. And on some days,I spend so much time, putting her down for a nap,all he has to do is pick her up!and she puts her head on his shoulder and dozes off in 5 minutes.Bedtimes are also incomplete without Papa.She keeps looking out for him,till he doesn’t come and join us .
She loves to gently touch our faces with her hands.Its so amazing,feeling that soft little hand on our faces. At other times,the meltdowns continue.We are kind of able to recognise the signs now, and many meltdowns have been successfully averted. Though there are some that still can’t be helped. Like today, she didn’t want to put on her diaper and her Papa just put it on her,forcefully. And she got upset and she cried and cried..flinging her body..not listening..just crying. I think she was tired and not well. He took her out,I walked with her,then showed her the magic of flicking switches and making everything bright.That cheered her up.
In these 17 months, she has grown so much(knock on the wood),changed so much,from the little baby,we brought home.This change is amazing. I don’t know what else to say..But leave you with this
17 day old wonder
Of Boo,Baby and Black Cheep.
Do you know what is common between these three,other than the obvious B? Well, these are some of the words that Aadya says..most commonly.
Baby is anything or anyone who can be her friend.For example her toys- her teddy,her dolly and her Angie, another toddler,another child.Anyone. Anything or anyone,which is in the same height range as her!well,her dolly is small,but it is called Baby too. She picks up the dolly,pats her,puts her on her shoulder and calls her Babee..We see some little girl in the grocery store,she points at her and says,Babee.. A little boy,seen running around in the park,is pointed at and called Babeee..It really doesn’t matter,if the Babee is a good two years older than her. When we put her to bed,she puts the teddy next to her,pats it and says Babee Aaa aaa. Angie,is another story though..She is like her friend. My friend,Vidya gifted it to her.Its a pink and white poodle from Build-A-Bear Workshop and she loved it from the moment she saw it,even when it was not stuffed. So,she has fights with Angie,wags her finger at her and scolds her. There was a time,when she was almost inseparable from Angie.. That phase is over,for now.
Boo is when she gets hurt. Whenever she fell down,I used to say..”Ohh Boo ho gaya..” Now she comes to me and says Boo Hua and I have to kiss it to make it better. The first time,I kissed her Boo,she was surprised and stopped crying. I kissed her finger and asked her is it OK? and she just said No..I kissed again and again..till she smiled. Now,I need to kiss her Boo twice only then she says YAS iss OK,with a shy smile.Oh and when kissing the Boo,utmost precision is required.If she presents her hand,to show the boo,you cannot just kiss the hand.If you do so,she will go on to put her finger at the exact stop where the BOO Hua,getting frustrated if your big lips,cannot kiss the tiny spot her little finger points at!
And lastly,Black Cheep- This little girl loves her nursery rhymes and sometimes sings them for us..Well not the whole thing,but she knows how to prompt mumma to sing…So,she toddles up to me and sings in the sweetest voice..”Baba Baba Back Cheep”…Excited mumma,tells her go on..sing more baby..sing like this..So, mumma sings the whole rhyme and then,baby applaudes and kisses!!Oh and kissing,has to be loud and clear..UUUUUUUUUUUUUMAAAAAAAAAAH! like that! She starts saying the UUU from a distance,comes towards you with puckered lips,gently touches the face and says..Uuumaaaaaaaaah!Oh and now, she showers me with kisses..ummm..I make her,every day at nap time, we lie in bed,I point at my cheek,saying,”ek kissie,aadi..” and she does..then the other cheek and the eyes, and so on. Its fun 🙂 these toddler years.
Oh..I digress..not that it matters,its all about Aadya..So,another song that she likes listening to is..ABC..So,she starts it..” A B cee dee…” and points at me..Yeah Yeah I oblige..always!
The funniest thing happened today..we were putting her to sleep- These days, thankfully,she always wants the Papa to be around too.I am happy,I am not the only one,getting frustrated when she is not sleeping.So, first she just didnt want to settle down,she just kept pointing at the bedroom door.Wondering,if she may be hungry,I went out with her and it turns out,Madam wanted a bath.So,I gave her a quick bath,while Papa got her bottle ready. That done,we were back in bed.The dudu was drunk and the sippy put away..and she refused to sleep! I got really angry and told her,”Aadya I am going to count till 5 ,if you dont sleep,That’s it!” So,I started, “One”….”Two”… she puts up two fingers and grins “Thee”… We both burst out laughing..And she jumped right in..And no she didn’t sleep right away,we played some more,we let her stay up past the bed-time,because we were hungry.We finished dinner,by then she was ready to sleep..Happily came to bed with me. Its so funny,I always have to sleep with the bedroom door closed.Now,when Aadya is sleepy and wants to sleep,she pulls me by the hand and makes sure,the door is SHUT behind us!
Isn’t it funny,how certain things you have been doing almost unconsciously,but the little one picks it up ?
On a totally different note,I am going to enable comment Moderation..Only because,that way,I am regular in replying to your comments 🙂
Artsy Shartsy
Today Ms. Aadya was very restless and was getting upset,when I tried to make her nap with me,at my naptime. She kept pointing at the door and wanted to go to the living room. Not one to give up easily,I dragged my pillow and balnket to the couch..but she got even more upset. After trying to sleep for a good 30-30 minutes,I gave up.
I tried reading to her-she didnt want to read.Then,singing..she put her hand on my mouth..in an attempt to shush me. Then I remembered some colors I had picked up a few days back,for finger painting.We tried it sometime last week and she wanted to taste the color-one lick with a finger, the rigourous mouth wshing and stern No,was all it took to discourage her from eating the whole tube. She made a general mess of herself,her clothes,her hair and the newspaper that I gave her to splash color on.
Today,however,I thought of trying something else.We had a hanger,from a 6-pack of onsies.I thought of doing something fun with it. It had a general appearance of a tree..so,we started out with a big blot of red color. I showed her how to spread it all over the hanger. She did..Then we let it dry and started coloring in the color book with crayons. When the finger-paint dried up,I took a tube of brown oil paint and a brush and evenly spread the brown all over that. and hung it to dry.
Then,we played with the blocks and colored some more. And as I watched the drying hanger..a thought struck me..it didnt look like a tree..but looked like a lobster or something. So,I quickly got it down and dotted some yellow color on the ends and helped Aadya,blend it. And then,to add a final touch, made the eyes..
I present to you,our first attempt at art work –
Welllllllll, what do you think??
All my doings and the movie
Weekends are meant to sleep-in and we are strong believers of that. We don’t make any early morning plans,we rarely meet people for lunch on weekends,because by the time we eat breakfast,most people are beginning to think of lunch and by the time,we do lunch,normal people are thinking of tea. This was pretty much what we did until a few months back.
Even when I got pregnant,I would wake up in the mornings ,ravenous..So,I would sneak to the kitchen,grab a cup of milk,drink it in bed,reading a book and then go back to sleep. Then,Ms.Aadya happened and she started waking up early..So,I’d just nurse or give her a bottle and cuddle up with her,and she would go back to sleep too.
But a couple months back,she decided that the weekend should be treated as any other day..and its a great idea to wake up early.So,now,she wakes up early..and starts playing,jumping on the bed,poking me..till I don’t get up. I hate being woken up from my sleep,and god help the one,who tries to wake me up from my slumber..well..except if that someone is Aadya. So,i wake up..and most days,being a meanie that I am..I tell her to ask papa to wake up..Bolo Utho utho baby (say wakey wakey baby) and she would just pat him.Yesterday,they were both up and I was sleeping,this little missy comes up to me and pats me on the cheek and says-“Mamma,utho utho!” Oh well,I taught her to say it!
When Sanj is in the bathroom and we are getting late for going somewhere..or sometimes,just to tease him,I have Aadya knock and tell her to say Kholo papa kholo(open up,papa). She just taps on it one or two times and then comes running to cling to me..a couple days back,I went to the bathroom and closed the door.Aadya and Sanj were in bed,reading a book.She pushed the book away, and banged the door-“dham dhaam” and screamed,”Mumma,Khollo” I mean how is that she never says it when I tell her to say it..but is ready to use it for me!!Grrr..
When Aadya is being naughty,I just wag my finger at her and scold her…or try to..Sometimes,I ask her,Understand? or Got it? Now, whenever,we are talking or arguing and our voices are raised,Aadya,wags her finger at the offending party..and says something,gibberish..we used to just laugh it off..until a few days ago,she turned towards me,when I was laughing and scolded me some more and said,”Understand?” with a dead-pan serious expression!!! I just wanted to go hide somewhere!!Need I say,how much Sanj enjoyed watching my face turn white!
And this one surely takes the cake..Sanj and Aadya were cuddling in bed and Aadya was patting her dolly. so,she was trying to put her to sleep.She was humming..aaaaa aaaa aaaaa…and patting the doll.Suddenly she got up,propped her self on her elbow and scolded the dolly..haaannnnnnnnn..ninni ninni.. Gosh..it was so cute..but so identical to our typical nght-time scene..Me patting Aadya..,humming,aaa aaaa aaa..and propping myself up on the elbow and scolding her,for not sleeping..haaannnn.. ninni karo.. jaldi close your eyes and ninni karo!!
Uh-oh time to change my tactics!!:D
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And now the movie,that I almost watched.So,we went to watch The dark knight with some friends..I had been really down,last couple days and so Sanj planned this evening,the Batman,being my favorite and all.We got to the theatre well in time and got great seats too.There was a lot of room for Aadya to play and we were close to the exit.Besides,it was almost her bed-time. Mostly,we just go for the last show,that way,she sleep through it..Ideally,I would’ve liked to not take her..but,somethings cant be helped. So,not to digress.10 minutes into the movie,Aadya,started getting fidgety,we gave her popcorn,she munched happily.A little extra snack never hurt anyone. Pop-corn finished,she turned back and started pointing to the bag of popcorn that belonged to the people behind us. After the usual No-No’s she started watching the movie..and almost dozed off..but,then the screen lit-up,and she was wide awake.I took her out,let her run around in an attempt to tire her out.She was more than happy to run around. We played catch in the deserted upper floor lobby. Then,she started feeling sleepy.So,I changed her diaper,put her in the stroller,gave her the bottle..And started walking her.normally 10 minutes of this routine and she is fast asleep..But yesterday was something else.She just didn’t want to sleep. I walked around the mall,before it closed one time.Sanj offered to trade places..but I figured at least one of us,could watch the complete movie!
So we walked some more..and after a while,I actually started enjoying the quiet walk.When I got tired,I sat down,drank some water,gave her some water and called my dad.Had a quiet chat with him,while Aadi looked around. As soon as I hung up,she said,”Mumma Ghumi”..yes baby,I said..and off we went for Ghumi again..While everyone else enjoyed the movie..we enjoyed our own movie…Sigh.. the dark knight will have to wait..until this fair princess is awake!
Weaning from Bottle to sippy cup
Sooooooooo, we have been bottle-free for a little over 3 weeks now..Yayyy!
This is one transition,I was worried about.I had heard so many horror stories of babies crying their heads off for their bottles and being the weak heart that I am..I just wasn’t ready for it. My own siser didnt want to give up her bottle and one day,my mom just “accidentally” dropped it in front of her and she cried her hearts out over bottle “tutti”,I wondered how I would break this solid bottled.Since I had to wean her off breast-feeding too,I decided to take things slow,one thing at a time.
But when we went for Aadya’s 15 month check up,her pediatrician said that she should have been off the bottle by then..Her reasoning behind it was that bottle just adds to empty calories. It made sense to me..This little girl would any day trade in her bowl of dal rice for a bottle of milk.
So,I decided,it was time to take things seriously.In part,I think I waited this long because I was lazy.I mean she was drinking from an open cup and sipping from the straw too.But,it meant more cleaning..sitting with her for 20 minutes..holding the cup,so she could drink it.So,I just kept putting it off. And she had almost given up on her sippy cups.She refused to take it.Thus began my quest for the perfect sippy cup..something that she liked.
First I tried again with her old sippy cups, the ones with soft rubber spouts from Nuby .She sipped from it for exactly two minutes.Next I tried some no-name brands from Walgreens and CVS,just to get her interested.But all she wanted to do was play with them.I re-tried Avent Trainer spout..She cried through the whole thing and didn’t drink any milk.I think she was so used to the quick flow in the bottle nipple that sucking from a sippy cup required strength and she didn’t think it was worth the effort.
My friend P had been telling me about how her son baby A liked his sippy cup,which had a straw in it.Then it dawned on me..that she loves sipping from straws so why not try one like baby A’s.I found one and tried giving her some water in it..She took it..And in fact,started drinking water from that cup,every single time.Yayy..so we had a winner.But she still wouldn’t drink milk from it.
Now,I know Aadi is the hungriest when she wakes up from her nap.So,one day,I just offered her the sippy cup,filled with milk,instead of her bottle and she took it.But the flow in this cup was too fast for her to gulp.It was fine for water but not for milk.
So, we tried two more and finally found one which required slightly more work to get the milk out.It was one of those spill-proof cups from Playtex.I let Aadya choose the cup.And made a big deal about it. First I tried sucking from it..like P had suggested and then,made the valve slightly larger with the help of a knife. And gave her milk in it.
We did the after nap milk in the sippy cup,for about a week.But she still needed her bottle first thing in the morning and at nap-times and bed times.I tried taking away the nap-time bottle and she cried and cried..and it broke my heart. I let her keep it. And i think a big hindrance was a bleeding heart Papa too.Every time,I tried to take the bottle away,at bed-time or nap time he would give in to the tears and give her the bottle.
Then,one morning,I just replaced the first bottle of the day with her new shiny sippy cup! I was nervous and kept the bottle by the bed..ready to jump out the bed and transfer the milk from cup to bottle.So,I gave her the sippy cup..and both of us ooh-aahed over the new cup..And cuddled with her from both sides.And SHE drank!and finished !!! all the milk. That was a start.
After that I never gave her a bottle in the morning.Even if it meant scrubbing the sippy with my eyes shut after a long tiring day..I did it.
2 days after that I tried giving her the sippy at nap time again..And again she cried and cried and refused to drink from the sippy cup. The next day,I gave her the sippy cup 10 minutes before her nap time and let her play with it..Then asked her if she wanted milk and poured some in it ,in front of her.She was excited..we counted the seconds off the microwave together.. and then I gave her the sippy cup. She drank from it..and then threw the cup and then turned over and slept.I kept up this routine..followed by lots of Ooh-ing and aah-ing. and good jobs!
But we were still left with the bed time bottle..That one took longer to get rid off.But, I started giving it to her,around 2o minutes before bed time.That way,she drank her milk,we played,read and then lights off. But surprisingly 3 days into this routine and she was off the bottle.
On the 4th day,I was cooking and she was sitting on the kitchen counter,and spotted the bottle.She pointed it out to me..”This?” I said,”yes baby..that’s your bottle.”Aadi ko chahiye?”[Does Aadi want it?].And gave it to her..she looked at it,upside down and then held it for the longest minute and then chucked it,in favor of something else.The bottle is still on the kitchen counter.but she is not interested anymore.I guess she was more or less ready for the change. Also what helped was that she saw the milk in the cup,and so knew that she was getting the good stuff.I would really recommend getting those see-through sippy cups for beginners.If they see what they are going to down,they gulp it happily.
Like last time,this time also I tried step by step elimination..I don’t think I would have been able to go cold turkey.Oh..and most of all,it was possible because I took away the last two feeds-the nap-time and the bed-time bottle,on a weekday..when Sanj was working!hehehe..EVIL mommy!
But its so funny.. right from Day one Aadya has known..when he is around and always cries out to him for attention.Even when she was 2 or 3 days old,and I was trying to get her to latch on,she would try to cooperate if it was just the two of us,in the room.But when Sanj was in the room too,she would definitely cry and scream..like asking him for help!!And every single time,it worked.He would get mad at me and want to take her away from me..like I was some evil mother..torturing his princess. Gosh!we fought so much in those first 4 days…it was like that’s all we seemed to be doing.. every time,she cried,whoever was holding her,would get yelled at. I asked Sanj to “get out of the room” one time when he yelled at me,for forcing her to latch on!!Hehehe crazy times..Imagine,you spend so much time worrying about whether your baby is going to breast feed or not..and then you spend even more time worrying about whether she will ever be weaned off or not. 🙂
All the best Cee Kay,Rads and Mona 🙂
Weaning off breast-feeding
A friend wanted to know how I weaned Aadya from Breast-feeding.
And just the very next day, Mona and I were chatting when she asked me about how I weaned Aadi off her bottle and after giving her a few pointers,I decided to write a post about it. We had trouble breast feeding initially and that’s when I had decided to breast-feed Aadya for about 15 months..against the recommended 1 year,as if to make up for time lost.
So,when she turned 1 year old,she was both bottle-fed and breast-fed and her pediatrician told me to try and get her off the bottle in time for her first birthday.But the bottle was so darn convenient..more than her,I think I was the one who wasn’t ready to let go of it.Every time we were out in the car and she was crying,I would prop the bottle in her mouth and she would be happy. I am quiet sure,that on certain days,she used the bottle as a replacement of her pacifier..but whatever kept her quiet.
The day after she turned one,I started her on whole milk and she loved it. Since the pediatrician was already nagging me to get rid of the bottle,I tried giving her milk in a sippy cup,and then in an open cup. She refused to drink milk in the sippy cup..as it was for water ONLY.She would drink from the open cup,but soon the novelty wore off and we were back to the bottle.
In the mean-time,I was trying to fit in cups/bottles of whole milk with breast-feeding.So,I first replaced the mid-morning feed with a cup or bottle of milk.She was happy..Slowly after a week or ten days,we replaced the after-nap feed with the bottle too. And so on we continued till only two feeds were left- the early morning and bed time feed. By this time she was almost 14 months.
Then one I was too tired and Sanj let me sleep in and gave Aadya her bottle.And she was equally happier.She snuggled close to between us and happily sipped her bottle and then dozed off again.Sanj was happy too,because this time she was cuddling with him,instead of me. And that was one of the last morning feeds.And we were down to just one feed,sometimes two,but mostly one at bed-time.About 2 weeks before she turned 15 months,we were out all day.one Saturday and she didn’t fuss or ask to be nursed.And i didn’t offer after we came back.Next day,again,we were out,but that she kept tugging at my shirt.I gave her the bottle and she was OK.When we came back,I did nurse her.But,I knew it was just a paci-feed. She nursed a little and then just snuggled up.
After that,every time,she tugged at my shirt,I would give her the bottle,and cuddle up..snuggle real tight.And soon,we were completely weaned off.One week later,I woke up and realised,that Aadya hadn’t nursed for one whole week.
I had heard and read of so many things about weaning the baby-horror stories about physical discomfort etc.. but the thing that worked for us was gradual elimination ..By the time,we finished,we were both ready to let go.I did feel a little bad,initially..I think I was a little depressed over the fact that my baby is growing up too soon..But the fact that I could be more independent and have more choices when we were out,made me feel good.The first time I ordered a Latte for myself and organic milk for the baby..I felt GOOD!!
So,all you mommas trying to wean off your baby, be patient..its going to happen..when you and the baby both are ready. Go slow..be persistent and you will be fine.
But if you do decide to go cold turkey,be sure,you have lots of cabbage in your refrigerator and a good painkiller,on your bed-side table.
Why Cabbage you ask? The instructor at the parenting and child-birth course we attended,was also a lactation consultant and she suggested stuffing the bra with cold cabbage leaves, if you have to stop breast-feeding immediately.
I haven’t tried it..but she swore by it and even claimed to have tried it herself.
So, good luck!
Transition from Bottle to Sippy-cup coming up next.
Play-date and a Meltdown averted
First of all,Thank you everyone,who took the time to write to me,after my last post.I still don’t know,what could have triggered that meltdown. I am guessing,it was hunger,mixed with waking up at a strange HOT place. Well whatever it was,left me tired and scared.
So,two days after that,when we got asked to a play-date at the same mall,I was not too thrilled.But,I didn’t want to miss out on meeting some friends and so agreed to go.
We had decided to meet near the play-area.Now, this is a place,that we go to at least once,sometimes twice a week. But, that day,Aadya refused to get out of her stroller. Have I mentioned,how much she loves her new stroller? She will happily sit in it for hours,if we just keep moving.Now,grocery-trips and walks are good fun for us too.So,she refused to get out of her stroller..I forcefully got her out,she saw the kids and was happy.Then,I took off her shoes.Have I mentioned,shoes are the next favorite on her list?The moment she wakes up,she goes off toddling,to look for her shoes and then demands”Mumma,Thiss”-the shoes need to be put on then.And she walks around all day,wearing those shoes..Sometimes,wearing just her diaper and the shoes.
Anyway,not to digress,I quickly took off the shoes,distracted her and took her to the place,where my friend was sitting.Now Aadi always runs off to play,as soon as we get inside the play=area.But that day she saw,my friends baby,S.S was hanging on to her mommy and so Aadi,tried to be friends with her. first said Hi, then,tugged at her hand,pointed at the tunnel.That didn’t work.Then,this little doll,went and hugged S.They are the same age and so,it was nice,watching them,together.Both the girls,were such opposites..Aadi,open,uninhibited and S,shy,reserved. S, was getting scared..and I sat down,next to Aadi and had a little mommy-baby talk with her,about how S was upset and didn’t want to play then..and could she go and play with some one else.I dunno how much she understood,but she left S alone,after that.
Another friend arrived with her two boys.The younger one is almost one and he was clutching a small box that had some raisins it ,for his snack. The box was an attractive yellow,that Aadya fancied,almost immediately.But who cares about such small things when,you can run and play. But,she didn’t forget.
We came out of the play-area and gave the kids their snacks.Also,each one passed around their snack boxes for the other kids to share.And when the box of raisins came along,Aadi wanted the whole thing. She was munching on her grapes, but refused to let go of that. I picked up a couple raisins and passed it along.
Now, she got really angry and showed me the FINGER! Err..Her forefinger,threatening to shove it up her nose!eww I know. This is the newest “cool thing”.one or two times,I saw the finger hovering around the nostril and said NO! And since then,the little brat knows that its something that bothers mommy and so,every time she is angry with me,she threatens to put her finger in her nose.So,she showed me the finger and I said,”No,Don’t be angry.That’s not yours, you can eat your grapes.”She asked for the raisins again.Again,I said No! And this time,the finger went up the nose. I glared at her, pulled it out,sneaked glances at my girl-friends.Everyone was busy with their little ones. By now she got upset and started crying.I excused myself and took her for a walk. A short quiet walk..she stopped crying and called out to me. I stopped walking and hugged her,offered her some water,wiped her hands and offered her the grapes again. This time she took the grapes. I let her eat the grapes,while I spoke to her quietly. When she finished her snack,we joined the group again. This time she was calmer and happier..working her charm on everyone .:)
I am so glad,I wrote about her last melt-down and I am so glad,that you all took the time to write to me..
The rest of the play-date was so much fun..Almost everyone,wanted to take her home with them 🙂 and one time,she even waved bye-bye to me ..and refused to come,when i stretched my arms,out to her.
Guess, all’s well.I Haven’t been threatened with the finger in the last two days..it was the weekend and we were busy clinging to daddy..both,mom and baby.The last time,she got angry,she threatened to switch off the TV..and glared at me with the same stern look,that I give her. How, Oh how,does she know,what is more important when?
And speaking of how does she know,how does she know,the difference between a yellow ball and yellow Laddu(sweet)? The ball,she plays with and the laddu,she pops in her mouth even without being prompted! I know for sure,I didn’t teach her that! So,how does she know??
Mother of All Meltdowns.
Yesterday Sanj had his Doc’s appointment first thing in the morning and was going to come home for an early lunch and so,I was busy getting lunch ready all morning.And Aadya missed her morning nap too. So,by lunch time,she was so droopy eyed. I thought she would sleep,as soon as she finished eating,but didn’t happen.
Later in the afternoon,I took Aadya to the mall.We had a nice time,walking around,window shopping.She was so excited,she didn’t even want to take her nap. I also didn’t force her and really,I couldn’t have even if I wanted to.We went to the play area-she loves playing there,but yesterday she didn’t want to get out of her stroller.So,I just kept walking.
We went to Barnes and Noble,bookstore and she was so excited to be in the children’s section.She almost jumped out of her stroller.We played with the assorted soft toys, then,noticed the train set and abandoned the toys..Poor Mumma had to pick up everything.while zooming one engine after the other,the little eyes spotted something pink and purple..( the favorite colors ever!!) and the train set was left behind.The pink and purple thing was actually a ride-on Car!!Some one Else’s!! and so obviously very interesting. I told her no first time,she listened..then,turned around to take one last glance and got attracted again..and again..
I had to pick her up and carry her to the other side,where I thought we would cuddle up and read some books..or flip some pages.But no such thing happened.She spotted a group,that was much more interesting than just plain old mumma. There was a mommy,a grandma and yuppieeeeeeeee 3 kids! So, Mumma was promptly forgotten and the Princess,decided to go and spend her evening with them. Mumma coaxed her to say “bye-bye” and then we sat down to read.4-5 pages and she was bored.We picked another book..this time a puppet book..Elmo and he clapped too. That she liked. And then,suddenly just like that she was bored,got up,said..bye..and left. I followed her..so she decided to play catch..She ran and went and hid behind two teen aged girls.I picked her up,put her in the stroller and took a deep long breath,found a comfortable chair,near the glass overlooking the walkway,gave her the snack cup.She sat looking out,munching her fruit,while I happily read my book. All was well in my world.
Then,tummy full,she slept,while we were window shopping.As soon as I saw her sleeping,I rushed back to the bookstore cafe and ordered myself a white chocolate mocha.I needed it after all that..and in retrospect,for later too. So,I sat sipping my coffee,reading my book.I must have just finished half of my mocha,when the princess woke up.First,she smiled at me sweetly,I started moving the stroller,hoping that she would sleep..but no,she woke up and she was angry.She started crying.I gave her some water,she said NO..cookie NO! By then she was bawling.I tried to come out of the book store..and she started thrashing..I took her out of the stroller.BIG mistake. She got even mad.I tried to put her back in the stroller,and she slipped out..GAhhhhhhhhhhh…
Everyone around me was staring at me..waiting to see what I do. The new stroller is light..it has no cup holders and if the bag on the handle is too heavy and the stroller empty it tips over. So,as soon as Aadya slipped /jumped out,the stroller fell down.So,I grabbed her with one hand,steadied the stroller with another.She wiggled out and ran toward the exit..I pushed the stroller and ran after her..once outside,she walked around angry and crying..for some more time..she didn’t want me to pick her up.I set up both the bags on the stroller and picked her up,rushed to Starbucks and bought milk for her.She loves the organic vanilla milk there.But yesterday she just refused to drink it. I ordered another ice tea for myself.I was tired and sweating..I am not kidding and I had forgotten my mocha,in the bookstore..There was no way I was going back there.
The crying continued..She was so sad/upset/angry.Even when I was carrying her,she was crying.She was hugging me tight and crying.And she didn’t want me to sit down.And she didn’t want to eat or drink.I decided to go to the family lounge-so that if she needs a diaper change,I will do that there or if she just wants to cry..she can do so,but I will be spared the pointed looks of bystanders. So,I just put her sippy cup,my iced tea cup in the diaper bad,set it on the stroller and carried Aadya in my arms. And she decided,she wanted to push the stroller..while I was holding her.I managed to reach the family lounge..And this whining monster turned all sunshiny.I thought..wow..I looked up to two girls walking by with their moms..So,the smiles were for them.
They passed us by and the whining started again. I just sat down on the chair in the family lounge..The Tandav continued for some more time and then,like an angel,a mom came out of the restroom with her daughter I think 4-5 year old. Aadi saw them and started smiling,waving at them..I almost went down on my knees and asked her to please not leave me alone..ever!! She gave me an understanding look..and said”honey this too shall pass”..”I hope so”..I mumbled.. They stayed and talked to us for a while..
The moment passed..and Madame cooled down. I offered her all the same things again..her milk,her water,her snack and my iced-tea.She chose my iced-tea,obviously..and sipped it daintily..If I told anyone at that moment that this was the same little girl,who had a melt-down minutes ago,they would laugh on my face.Then,I offered her some pretzel bites and she ate that too. Again something she had refused earlier.
And all was well again. But,it left me thinking,what was it that triggered this melt-down. Was it lack of sleep? or was it hunger? Or was she feeling hot?Or was she hungry and hot and didn’t understand what was going on?
Meltdowns are a part of growing up..but they are hard to deal with.I find myself tired and sapped of energy at the end of each big meltdown..really.When she was thrashing and pushing me away,I tried to be cool,but a teeny tiny bit of my heart,did wonder if something had happened that made her hate me suddenly.The books,the countless websites and the pediatricians tell us,to put the angry child in a safe place and go on with your business..That’s only possible at home.Surely,you can’t leave you crying child in the middle of a busy shopping mall and continue window shopping. Then,I also read,somewhere that if you are outside,then,take the child to a quiet corner and be with her,for as long as she is upset.Then,when she calms down,hug her and tell her,that you understand why she was upset.
I tried that,I took her to a calm place.. but for me to act calmly and find the calm place or the right place didn’t happen instantly.It took a lot of experimentation.And finally,why did she eat and drink the same things that I had offered her earlier..but in the new place..was it because she was tired of the strangers milling around in the mall..Why?
Whoever said-“Parenting means constant learning,” wasn’t kidding.
What is your take on this?How would you have reacted if your toddler behaved like this and you felt lost and didn’t know what to do with him/her?Please take a minute and tell me 🙂
The weekend that was
Last week our weekend arrived a little early…or should I say we got into the weekend mood a little early.
Thursday morning,we woke up to an irritated Aadya and realised that she is teething.She refused to let go of mommy..and by evening, we had a very fussy Aadya,a near starving Mumma and a confused Papa. Looking at my tired face,Sanj offered to take me out of dinner..and my face lit up.”Enchiladas” I thought and he guessed it,looking at the faint smile on my lips. So, we set off to look for a nice Mexican restaurant.We just drove off on a road, less travelled by us and saw this restaurant called “La Hacienda Ranch”.It had a very rustic look from the outside and I almost didn’t want to go inside..It just looked like a deserted inn in the middle of nowhere…and I was sure to find it full of drunks and truckers. But as we slowly circled around the parking lot,we saw a couple of families and decided to try it.
As soon as we opened the door, we were greeted by a huge BEAR! A stuffed full-sized bear was placed exactly opposite the door. And looking at that magnificent animal,Aadya refused to enter..We finally coaxed her in and stepped into the actual restaurant. A beautiful hostess in a white shirt.blue jeans and cowboy boots and hats showed us to our table and then,began a wonderful experience . We each ordered for drinks and munched on the chips and Salsa,waiting for our server. If the outside was rustic, the inside was even more rustic..There were lanterns hung by the windows.The tables were covered with plastic cow-skin print table covers. The actual restaurant was kind of like a log cabin.The bar was adorned with rifles and antler heads and there was also a cute log bench,to rest your butt on.
The food arrived in big china plates and the portions were sumptuous. While we were chomping on our food,some one on the next table ordered Guacamole and the waitress made it fresh for them,right in front of their eyes..I thought that was pretty cool.I ordered an Enchilada for Aadya too and she finished it. So, now I am looking for Enchilada recipe.
Half way through the meal,Aadya tried to grab food from my plate-when I said No, she reached for Sanj’s drink..I said No again and she got angry,refused to look at me for a long time.I tried the same trick,but she knows how to take mumma’s heart and turn it to mush..When I pretended to not look at her,she pulled my hand and kissed it silly.I gave up!!
On our way out, we saw that that outside,there were bags filled with water hanging..I think for thirsty travellers or their horses,like in olden days. All in all it was a great experience..I only wish I had my camera..but may be taking some pictures is just the right excuse to go back there!
Friday night was spent bowling.We went bowling after almost 2 years.The last time,we went bowling was 2 days before we found out I am pregnant..and then,we never got a chance to go.Another couple and their two year old,Aashi joined us. Aadya decided she really liked Aashi and wanted to kiss her..ON HER LIPS! Aashi tried to point at her cheeks to tell Aadya to kiss there.. but she just wanted to kiss her friend on the lips,much to our amusement and Sanj’s dismay.We had fun bowling and Aadya had fun..running away,patting strange men on their bare knees,embarrassing us,dancing on the table and lifting her shirt…Sanj shot me such looks..like “Where is she learning all this from?”..Oh well..At least we will be prepared for much worse when she turns into a teenager.
Saturday was relaxing…I went for a much needed Mani-pedi TLC session with two Girl-friends and boy! was it fun! This is a Chinese place and they do amazing hot-stone massages..I came back rested and relaxed,only to stuff my toe,on the way in the door. The darn thing started bleeding and is now swollen like a raisin in water..and it hurts like hell.Oh and before leaving from the nail spa,I fell down..I tried sitting on a chair and it moved and I landed rather ungracefully on my butt. Anyway,coming back to the toe..SAnj cleaned and band-aided it and then,I went outside to the balcony to get something and opened the balcony door without looking and It came right on my other foot,scratching it and that started bleeding.And the cherry on top,I was closing a drawer and my finger got caught in it..Yeah,Ok..I know..someone had hexed a curse!!!Wonder who?
Sunday was nice..We went to a splash park, first thing in the morning..Aadya had a blast,running through the water fountains .She tried to drink it directly by putting her face right on top of it and opening her mouth wide..She did take some time getting warmed up..she was surprised to see so much water and didn’t know what to do..And then the unthinkable happened.Sanj got in the water.I say, unthinkable..because this is the guy,who doesn’t like the beach..he avoids getting wet..as much as he can.. but he really wanted Aadya to get in there and enjoy…and sure enough,seeing daddy there,she sauntered in too..and refused to leave later.Go on tell me..He is sweet!!
Then we went to have brunch at Panera and came home to enjoy the sweet afternoon siesta.It was a nice relaxed weekend 🙂
OK now your turn, tell me how was your weekend?
15 Marbles 
