15 Marbles

Moments.Musings.Memories. ❤️Gathering little marbles from ordinary days and keeping them for our memory jar. ❤️

recent posts

about

  • One year old

    March 30th,2008
    Aadya turns one year old. And as I sit down to write this post,I don’t know what to write.I have written and re-written this post in my mind..so many times that all I can come up with now is a blank.

    This last month has been very emotional…It was like,I just looked at Aadya and realised that she had suddenly grown up. My baby,who loved to be picked,who was content to be just held,was suddenly kicking and pushing to jump out of my arms,so that she could walk. The tiny baby that I gave birth to is suddenly an independent toddler.

    But then I realise,she was always somewhat of a free spirit,always having her own mind.She surprised us by looking into our eyes,when we spoke to her,even when she was a week old. If something upset her,she would just cock up her eyebrows,pout those tiny lips and start crying. At one month’s age,she was holding her neck steady and had already rolled once from right to left.She was mostly a happy baby..I don’t remember her crying a lot,even if she did,I didn’t quiet notice it..

    My first official glimpse (4 hours after birth)


    I fell in love with her,almost instantly..I don’t really remember,how she looked,when I first caught a glimpse of her,in DH’s arms.I was a little high on all the pure oxygen that I was inhaling and she was partly hidden behind him..and then they whisked her away.The next time I saw her,I had just thrown up,and was all misty eyed. And the nurse wheeled in this tiny bundle.The room was suddenly too noisy,some of our acquaintances couldn’t stop themselves from stopping by! And all I wanted was to hold her… to have her all to myself.

    We started telling her age in days, and then weeks and finally months..And each single day,brought out something new. There was never a dull moment.She has always been a friendly baby..having her moods very rarely.. like if she had just woken up or was really uncomfortable.But she just loved having people around her from a very young age…I remember taking her to the hospital at 5 days of age and she charmed,the nurses and technicians there,and not just because she was so tiny.. but because she actually cooed back at them.

    Breast-feeding was tough,but before I knew it she mastered it. Each month,brought about something new..and we were more and more in awe of her. She is just a born charmer..and such an attention seeker.. that even at 6 months of age,she knew when she wasn’t the centre of every one’s attention and even now she starts whimpering,when she doesn’t get attention.

    Then came solids,and she had a go at them too like a champ! Sure there are days,when she doesn’t even look at food. And she definitely has a choice..be it food or clothes..or colors. I think she favors pink .She loves some TV commercials and would not even blink when they are on. Same goes for the songs.She loves MUSIC.

    She was a perfect angel,when all her grandparents visited.They arrived here with some apprehension-is our Grand-daughter going to start bawling the moment she sets her eyes on us? But,she absolutely adored her Nanu and Dadu-Dadi leaving them thrilled to bits. She charmed all the other relatives,with equal ease,its like she just carved a niche for herself in every one’s heart.She met her aunt for the first time at 9 months of age,when stranger anxiety was at the peak,but she clung to her like she had known her all her life and the very next day,she slept peacefully in her arm,during a car-ride.I was shocked to see,my clingy baby smile at me from her masi’s arms.

    My baby girl,she’s perfect in every sense of the word..(knock on the wood) she managed to reach most of the developmental milestones before time or on time..and every single time ,my heart swelled up with pride. It didn’t matter that it was something as small as touching my face,or getting down from the bed on her own.. or if it was something big as walking or eating her own food. But,then I think,even if it weren’t for all these achievements,I would have still been so proud of her.. just because she is mine.. a part of me.The most perfect part of me.
    One Year Old Aadya,enjoying her party


    And if I thought that I was going to be take care of her,I was proved wrong.She started taking care of me,at one month’s age.One day,at dawn, a sleep deprived me,sat rocking her and I don’t know when I dozed off.Little while later,I heard a soft thud and woke up immediately and saw Aadya on the floor..she must have slipped out of my arms.DH woke up too and immediately took her away from me.How could I have dropped her.He was so upset,I was so miserable..What kind of a mother,just dozes off while her child slips out of her arms and falls down.I kept apologising to Aadya and to DH.DH didn’t want to listen..but Aadya, just wanted to be with mommy.. cuddling up and smiling at me..as if telling me all was well and forgiven. This is the first time I have ever spoken of this..otherwise it was just a secret DH and I shared.
    Having Aadya has made me feel like a super-human..I feel like I can do everything,I am emotionally stronger,since giving birth to her. Every time I look at her,I feel so blessed.
    She has started saying her name now..”Aadya-Aadya” she says,pointing at the thing that she wants.”Aadya-Aadya”,she says, raising her arms up,meaning pick up Aadya!Suddenly,the name that we love so much has become sweeter.She is getting quicker on her feet and every time I turn,I seem to bump into her.
    The soft thumps of little feet,sweet cries of Aadya-Aadya,anguished babble,wet sloppy kisses,a hug every few minutes…these were just the things missing in my world..The only things that make it perfect.
    Sometimes,I just sit back and look at Aadya and DH,pretend talking on the toy phone,working on their own laptops(My sis gave her a baby laptop,for her birthday) and I feel like I am the luckiest woman on earth. And then,I rush in to join them,only to be greeted with smiles,one toothy,one warm,and I am engulfed in a big hug,while the tiny one cuddles up closer squirming and squishing till she is right in the middle-right where she belongs.

    This one year,with Aadya has been a total bliss..and sometimes,I wonder that if there is a second baby,will I be able to love her/him with the same intensity..I don’t know.. She is the best thing that ever happened to us..
    Love you baby girl..Thanks for coming into our life and brightening it up a million times more.You are our love,our life..And on your 1st birthday,I just want you to know,that you mean the world to me and your papa.. You make us proud.I hope you get all the best things in life always.I know,you will be one good gal,strong and resilient…The best thing that I like about you is how you never give up,you try and keep trying till you don’t get it right..be it sucking water from a straw or holding the filled spoon and taking it to your mouth. We are just so proud of you..Love you darling and Happy Birthday!

    Edited to Add- I have been writing this post in parts,so may be there is no continuity.but,its just all the thoughts swimming in my head 🙂

  • Coming up

    One year Post and
    The Birthday bash post!
    Thanx for all the birthday wishes,everyone.Aadya has a bad case of spring allergies and so do I ..and so the two posts are still in drafts.

  • Happy Birthday, Darling!

    [24th feb 2011]I just found this in my drafts..n had to post it..

    March 30th,2008

    Dear Aadya,

    Baby you are turning one today.Last year,on this date,we were blessed with this miracle, that is you.We decided to call you, Aadya..Our baby girl,Our first born..we kept looking at you,kept touching you again and again..just to make sure you were real!And the fact that we made you,that you were inside me..that just made the whole experience surreal.

    This last whole month,I kept remembering our first month with you. I kept remembering your different cries..and your different expressions-the way you raised that one eyebrow,or the way you pout,how we picked you up so gently..how we watched you sleep.I also found myself thinking,that it always seemed like the most natural thing to do.

    I had a very emotional month,it was like,I watched my baby suddenly turn from a dependant newborn to a fiercely independant toddler-from a baby,who loved to burrow herself deep in my arms,to one,who kicked and almost jumped out of my arms to walk herself.Though,I want you to be less clingy,it hurt,when you waved me bye-bye ,ready to go for a walk with someone else. My baby girl is growing up..:)

    I remember I first got to hold you after three hours of you being born and I just didnt want to let go of you.That instant I was hooked.. my life changed forever and I couldn’t remember what life was before you came along.

  • All Things Nice

    Finally we have a venue and I love it.Its a chic Indian bistro,recently remodelled..and they have a separate party room,opening onto the patio. And the cake has been tasted and ordered too..from a different bakery altogether! So,I am not too worried anymore.The only thing is,I find myself getting extremely emotional as the birthday approaches..My baby girl is not going to be a baby anymore 🙂 She is already showing streaks of independence.She doesn’t want to be carried,as soon as we step out the main door.She just wants to walk around and explore..Funny though,how she insists on being picked up as soon as I start cooking or pick up the phone. But,anyway..I am going through these weird ups and downs..getting mad at DH too.. “how can you not feel anything?” But this post is all about nice things.So…
    Speaking of nice things,my sister got her tourist Visa approved and she would be visiting us soon. The first time she applied for the visa,it got rejected and they asked her not to apply for another year or two…The reasons being-She was single and didn’t have much of a job experience,what if she decided to get married and never return!This time however,it was a piece of cake!And she got a 10 year visa!So yayyy!
    As thrilled as I am about my sister’s visa and her visit..what prompted me to write this post were friends-not one but three.
    One I have known for the last 10 years,the other for almost a year and a half and the third, for a couple months.Let me tell you about the last(but in no way least) one. A lot of you know her-she is none other than our own Upsi. I first spoke to her a few months back,just before I was leaving for my India trip..BEing true aquarians,we hit it off immediately..talking 10 things at a time,and since then,we have chatted on and off,making plans to meet..but it never happened. So,when we started planning Aadya’s birthday party,I decided that this would be a good chance to meet. And I called her up and she agreed to come..Seeing how stressed I was about the venue,she offered to see if the clubhouse in her community was available for the party.And when that wasn’t available,this sweet sweet soul offered to open up her own home for the party.And how can I forget,she even got Mr.Upsi,busy,looking for a party hall. I mean who does that. Upsi,sweetheart,I am not writing all this to embarass you..Just wanted to let you know,that your gestures really touched us. I am so happy to have come across you through blogosphere and now looking forward to meeting you in person.
    The other friend I mentioned about is,my friend P.I met P through a pregnancy website,and we have stayed in touch,ever since. Her baby was born around 3 weeks after Aadya,but she has been a great support to me,through those months,when the hormones were raging all over the place or even now,when my emotions are running high. Her little boy,just turned 11 months,today. Its like she is my own personal support system. And all this without even meeting each other. Another bonding factor is our babies..they seem to related to each other in some karmic way.. Though,it sounds eerie,but almost every time that Aadya hasn’t been feeling well,baby A hasn’t been feeling well either.They have been reaching milestones around the same time too..Funny,Aadya has started saying Baby A’s name and everytime ,I say his name,she put her hand to her ear and says Hi! Hope to see you soon sweetie..
    And lastly,my friend Vidya..God!!its been so long that we have known each other.The first time,we saw each other was on my first day at college. Mine was a late admission and by the time,I finished all the formalities,I just about managed to reach my classroom in time.And the classroom was full..First years are always very attentive,cutting classes starts later! And then,I saw this one empty seat,I hopped up the stairs and settled down there.This was a quiet,shy girl..At least that’s what I thought then.. now,I know,she is not shy.. nor is she quiet.She is one of the most confident women,I know. She is flying down tomorrow to attend little Aadya’s first birthday. And I can’t wait to see her. I remember in our final year of college,we were both in separate classes,because we chose different majors.So,we never got a chance to talk to each other through out the day..with lectures and practicals and all the other things that needed to be done.So,we started taking the earlier local train and would get off at the earlier stop and sit on a bench at the local train station and talk! Some days we were so engrossed in our talks,that we even missed those early morning lectures!I am smiling just thinking about those days. She flew in for my baby-shower, and now for Aadya’s birthday..She has been there always..whenever I needed her! Always…she is one of those people who can hear my voice and tell my mood. I can’t wait to see her tomorrow!
    And the last nice thing…DH has been working crazy hours again..and almost everyday,he is late..and I am upset.I am emotional about Aadya turning 1..but I am also worried about DH’s health.I dont want the scary episode to be repeated. Anyway..today I offered truce and he accepted.And then,came back late again..too much work! So,I showed him my anger..one way or the other..and sulked. He took me shopping and drove 2 extra miles,just to get to Starbucks-Just so I could buy my favorite Frappuchino-“to cool me down”! Need I say,I am not sulking anymore!
    He’s a nice guy who just loves to irritate me. Ohh and now,Aadya is sleeping,so may be I should stop typing and go cuddle up with him on the couch..Ta!