Between appointments on a cold, grey, busy day, I spotted something that instantly lifted my mood.
Just look at her. 💜
Surrounded by rocks and weeds, and yet there she was — thriving, blooming, simply doing her thing.
Nobody told her this wasn’t the ideal place to bloom. So she did. 🌱
Truth be told I was in a world of pain that morning and was struggling with motivation and movement, but seeing these pansies reminded me of how far I have come in the last 6 months & inspired me to keep going , even if after a short break.
Sometimes you don’t have to go looking for little pockets of joy. They find you. 💜
We watched Spider-Man – Brand New Day over the weekend. It took me back to my childhood when I first watched Spider-Man cartoons on Sunday afternoons at 4:00 PM – Spidey swinging from building to building with the title song of ‘SpiderMan -SpiderMan’ ..
What do you call the feeling when your nostalgia collides with your present moments..😍 No, really? The little me with her short bob, fresh from a nap that mum forced her to take, sitting with a cup of hot cocoa met the mum me sitting with my little family, handing out snacks,she smuggled in her handbag to her own kids and husband . It’s amazing to enjoy the same things so many years later with the same pleasure.
Needless to say we are a family of Superhero fans and this was the perfect family outing with burgers for dinner, lollies and of course movies popcorn !
So, it’s been 6 weeks since the operation and I have had a lot of time to think, process, think more and forget about the world. I love people and love talking nineteen to dozen but not needing to hold a conversation and keeping the smile up has been nice too.
My default position and spot
I have been content staying home, reading, binge-watching shows and having occasional visitors. I have said this to whoever cares to listen but really that’s what most of my 6 weeks looked like. I have read more books than I have in the last 3-4 years – I have NEVER watched so much TV in my entire 46 years and that’s saying something 😃
I feel rested, but most importantly I feel like my brain has had the chance to slow down and push out the chaos that it has felt for the last 2 years. I don’t mean to say that the over-thinker in me has left the building- no – she is still very much there but my new motto has been better out there than in my head and so far that’s helping.
I learnt early on in the recovery that expecting everyone to read my mind will lead to disappointment so I now state what I need from my family and friends: ‘I need this /that’ ‘please don’t say – xyz’ ‘I would love a coffee’ ‘can you pick me up/ drop me there’ – just little things but saying them out loud tells me that everyone is happy to do things / help me and it’s OK to ask for help.
I have also learned that I don’t have to do everything myself at home – the husband and the teens are equally able and capable to do the same things. I just need to remember this as I get stronger and the urge to do everything myself takes over . Yes, that’s a life skill that I had to learn very quickly – now the challenge is to keep practicing it.
There’s so much more that I wanted to say but I took a break to watch my shows .. so, this is where I will stop ..
It’s been quite a few weeks since my trip to Thailand but I still dream of this warm delicious sticky rice with coconut milk and fresh Mango *drool*
It was a much awaited girls trip to commemorate a girlfriend’ 50th Birthday . And although I had to take it slow because my symptoms were at their peak and I had more flare ups in the 7 days that I was there than before , but I am so glad that I went. My bestie travelled from India and joined us for the second half of the trip and it was almost surreal that my two worlds were colliding beautifully.
It’s Day 25 PO today and last week was one of low energy , which may or may not have been contributed to by low moods and information overload. I am hoping for better days in the weeks to come.
I have stepped out a couple of times and it has been amazing, but exhausting. I am still walking quite slowly and sometimes wonder if people on the road judge me for walking like this ..maybe they do.. oh well, I can’t really help it 😃
In the last couple of days, I have binge watched Apple Cider vinegar and Taskaree on Netflix. Both series blew my mind and I highly recommend watching them.
That’s it for me.. nothing more exciting to report .
15 Marbles 