“Mumma give me another chance”..that seems to be Aadi’s favorite line these days. We have tried explaining choices and consequences to her and every time she makes one choice,she wants the other..right after. Like when we were buying her a toy-a present for reading continuously for 5 nights. She wanted an art set and a barbie and Lego. Lego,she decided against,because Nanhi could choke on the little pieces.Then the hard part came- to pick between the art set and the Barbie..both that she ‘REALLY REally Wanted’. So,we told her that she can get one now and the other,next time,when she does something really good. Ok, fine,she picked the art set.Are you sure,we asked her and she said,yes.Ok,we told her she could have the other thing,the next time,we thought she deserved a present.She nodded.
We got home and she played with the art set,finished the contents in less than 2 plays and then she asked if we could go buy the Barbie. No! both of us screamed in unison. You picked the art set,now you have to wait for the next time. Much screaming,(not-fair)s,(you-don’t-love-me)s later,SD said, OK,if she behaved well for one whole day,no tantrums,no fuss about food etc and she could get the Barbie. And she did and she got the Barbie. But since then,she has been asking for a second chance.
Last weekend we were having friends over for lunch. She had a pack of assorted candy from a friend’s party the previous day and she started the day with those. By the time I caught her,she was left with just one.I told her she could have it after lunch.She asked me again and I told her,if she ate the last candy before lunch,she would not get any dessert. The choice was hers..And she chose to eat it before lunch. Then came dessert time and she started hugging me,whispering softly..Mumma I made the wrong choice..can you give me another chance,please? with the cutest puppy-dog face ever.Not wanting to create a scene in front of our guests,I gave her the ice-cream.
Another chance is her favorite phrase these days.I don’t blame her completely,we have given her second chances in the past and she has started to feel like that’s the way of life. So,when I told her yesterday,it was quiet time,she chose to break the rules. Quiet time in this house means- No TV,No iPad..We can read,talk softly,draw/paint or just relax. One of the reasons,I insisted on quiet time was when I am at work,the girls and SD watch a lot of TV..even after we got home,they watched a movie and then,we had a long evening planned. So,I just wanted her to get some rest. Anyway,I went to check on her,and I found her with the iPad. I told her,she had broken the rules,so there will be no iPad/TV for her,whole of Sunday. She said Ok and continued to play her game.
Today morning when she woke up,she asked if she could watch some TV.I said no and reminded her,why not. She tried again,asked if I could give her another chance..I said no..She got frustrated,and told me so..”All I am asking you is another chance’..I didn’t give in.
She spent most of the morning,playing outside.She came inside,tried her luck again..I said no again.She didn’t ask again after that. We went out to a friend’s place for lunch..and even after we came back,she didn’t ask to watch TV. She spent an hour or so lying on the floor,on a makeshift bed made of pillows. She talked and talked and when I dozed off,she nudged me awake..:)
But, I hope today has taught her that you don’t always get second chances..Personally,I find it that she is better behaved and happier,when she has no TV/iPad time. Unfortunately,I can’t cut it out completely..but any way.. that was the story of another chance..