15 Marbles

Moments.Musings.Memories. ❤️Gathering little marbles from ordinary days and keeping them for our memory jar. ❤️

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  • Wish Heaven had a phone..

    Wish Heaven had a phone..

    Today would’ve been my mom’s 57th birthday.This morning when I woke up,I checked facebook only to find a photo of hers.My sister had used photoshop and added my mom’s picture to a group photo. OMG!I know it was photo-shopped..I know it was not real..but it was so nice to see my mom in the same frame as my husband and babies..and more importantly my dad.
    Seeing that picture made me happy and yet so sad and filled my heart with so much yearning for all that could have been. Not a day goes by when I don’t wish for her to still be alive.In my mind,I go through the various scenarios,that would’ve panned out differently,if she was still here.
    Oh dear…how I wish I could just talk to her,update her about the kids activities,tell her how they are driving me up the wall or confer about a new recipe or tell her about what SD said. I have spent most of the day feeling so choked up or crying,every time I looked at the picture..I wish I had a magic wand and I could just change things..Or At least if heaven had a phone,I could just call her and cry and then,she would just ask me to stop it or being a typical mom,ask me to grow up 🙂 And all would be fine.
    But no..I don’t have a magic wand and heaven doesn’t have a phone..so I’ll just have to pick up the pieces of my broken heart and go on..meeting whatever challenges life throws at me,in the only way I know-head on with a big smile on my face..
    Until next time…..

  • Nanya-speak and more…

    Six and a half years ago,when I first started this blog,it was my only voice.I could come here and write about my deepest,darkest feelings.Over the years,I have gone through several writers’ blocks..but not one of them has been as bad as this one. I finally figured it out why..I have started using facebook as a blog..Every little thing that happens,ends up on facebook..the instant comments are addictive!LOL!
    Honestly,I started writing this post 3 days back and still haven’t finished it.But then,when I have some time on hand,I like to read my old posts and after one such reading,I realized that I have missed writing about so many of Anan’s milestones and cute activities. I have missed out on writing about conversations with Aadi..And as if this continues,I’ll have literally no written memories of these two years.So,I have penciled in ‘blogging time’ in my day,every single day…a time when I will just do,what I love the most-writing my thoughts out.I’ll turn off facebook and the cellphone(I can access FB from the mobile too).
    Anyway,speaking of Ananya,she turned 2 years and 2 months and 2 weeks today. LOL!I didn’t plan to blog today,but its just a happy co-incidence.So my favorite toddler,Anan,ofcourse,calls herself “Nanya” and speaks in Third person about herself- “Nanya no like it”,”Nanya crying”,”Nanya wants chai-coco”.Chai-coco is Nanya-speak for chocolate milk.
    I finally weaned her off,two months before her second birthday,but we still struggled to get her to drink cow’s milk.And she starting getting sick- extreme colds,coughs and diarrhea. The cold and cough turned into ear-infection and a repeat ear-infection but the diarrhea didn’t stop,even after the mandatory wait of two weeks after the antibiotics were finished.She lost so much weight and completely went off food. Then,we found out that she was lactose intolerant. So now for about 2 months ( since August first week) we’ve been giving her Lactose free milk.And she loves it.There were no dramas at all about drinking the new milk.And she knows that she cannot drink the other milk. It makes me happy and breaks my heart at the same time,that she is so little,yet she knows.If I am distracted and pick up the wrong milk jar,she yells,”No Mumma,Nanya Want Nanya chai”..And thankfully the diarrhea has disappeared too.
    Nanya loves her Aadu..she does.This morning,she was sleeping,when SD dropped Aadi at school.After she woke up,we were getting ready to go out,I dressed her up and she started looking for Aadya and wouldn’t believe me when I told her Aadi was at school.Its heartwarming seeing them hug each other,after school.And it is frustrating,when they fight over the smallest of things.
    We had Spring break last 2 weeks and every single day,they would both wake up at 6:30am..EVERY single day of the vacation.And today,the first day of school,I woke up Aadi at 7:45am and she she complained about not getting enough sleep and as for Nanya,I had to wake her up at 9:00 am,because we were getting late for our appointment!LOL
    Anyway,its time to go pick up Aadi..so,I better stop..will be back with another post,tomorrow 🙂

  • Morning mischief

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    I took this picture two days back,on one of our lesser rushed mornings.Ms.Aadya had a dentist appointment and we knew that it was going to be an extraction,so she had the day off.Every morning,this is pretty much what they do..they are in each others space and face,sitting on each other,hugging kissing,screaming and squealing. That day,Aadi was kneeing in front of the couch and using it as a table and Anan was lying on the floor and their legs were entwined..sounds painful but it was the most peaceful moment and I had to click this photo..but sure enough,they moved and I got this picture instead..My sister calls it the “My Sunshines with beautiful sunshine” photo.And it is,indeed..:)

  • Dressing up the toddler

    Everywhere I go,I see these cute toddlers,well dressed,hair nicely combed,hair clips in place,shoes and socks on.Oh! don’t they look oh-so-adorable..?

    And then there is my toddler.Getting her dressed is such a BIG drama,every single time!If she had it her way,she would still be wearing the same t-shirt from 3 days back.Trying to change her clothes is nothing less than a feat. There is screaming-hers and mine , heavy panting-mine and angry crying-hers.

    T-shirt tackled,time for pants/skirt- Rinse and repeat the drama mentioned above.Have ever tried to put some pants on a crocodile rolling in the mud?No?Really?I do it every single day! As soon as its time to put the pants on,the crocodile rolling starts..kicking and rolling..and God forbid if I pick out a pair of tights to go with the socks..the whole exercise is enough to make me start pulling my own hair !!

    And there is no chance of putting on a dress.. doesn’t matter how pretty it is..doesn’t matter how cute she looks in it..Nope!She doesn’t do dresses..The rare occasions when she is distracted and I put one on her,she screams and cries and asks to take it off.

    Oh and the hair!! Let me not even get started about that.. She hates getting her hair brushed…even before the hairbrush touches her hair,she starts saying”Owie” …LOL!I am not kidding..I try so hard,holding her between my legs or putting her on the bathroom bench top.. and finally she is dressed..fairly well dressed.

    But by the time we get to our destination(even if its 5 minutes away!!)..the shoes & socks are kicked off,the hair clip is off and her curls have sprung.Seriously!What am I to do with her? I hope she’ll out grow this phase because I am seriously dreading her teenage years.

    But she is such an adorable little thing..when we are not in the midst of all this drama,just looking at her is enough to turn me into a mush pot..As I was busy typing away this post,she was eating her snack..she came and sat next to me with her bowl of rice crackers and kept feeding me,one by one.:)
    On that happy note,let me share with you something else that makes me happy..A Bunting.I finished this bunting yesterday.

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    The pattern for the hearts is from here.Its one of my favorite blogs these days.I love Jacquie’s tutorials and all the colors spread out on her blogs..definitely worth checking out 🙂

    The Bunting is up for sale on my facebook page and will be going with me to the market stall,in October:) Not-so-subtle business plug..LOL!

    I’ll back with another post soon…Trying to keep my head over the water…as life comes at me,yet again like a big wave,trying to drown me.
    xoxo
    Trish