Ever since I can remember, I have wanted a baby. Even as a little girl, I was so attracted to babies, wanting to hold them, care for them.So,having a baby soon after marriage seemed like the most natural thing to do. But, things were not meant to be so easy. After a year of trying to get pregnant and no success, we found out that I had a condition called Poly cystic Ovarian Syndrome, which seems to affect women in the childbearing age group. I was lucky enough to find a great doctor, who put me on the right treatment and then began our anticipation …Am I ? Am I not? Am I?
So, on August 18,2006, when I went to see my doctor for a regular visit ,scheduled because I had a low progesterone level..we were in for a surprise. The events preceding the visit were crazy. I was in a bad bad teary mood. I had not slept for the last 5 nites or days. I was just sooo tired and feeling crappy to the core. Hubby was stuck up at work. I had an appointment at 3.00 and hubby called up to say that he was not going to make it. So, either I take a cab or postpone it. I didn’t want to do that. Given my previous crappy state of mind, I didn’t want to understand any of his problems. And then the nurse called up to tell me that if I wanted to see my doctor ,I should reach her office by 12.00 coz she had to go away for some emergency. I called up hubby again, another argument followed and finally looking at my teary state, he decided to come and work from home for the rest of the day!So, We managed to reach the Dr.’s office at exactly 12.02. My Doc wanted to do a urine test before examining me. and Guess what? I couldn’t pee in the cup! After drinking 3 glasses of water and the nurses repetitively urging me.. i managed to give them a sample. And 5 mins later the doc came in and Said..
I have good news for u!! and We were stunned!! I still thought she was talking about the progesterone level and Said.. ohh u are kidding!!! she laughed and said.I am afraid not!!!
So, That’s how we got OUR Good News!
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After writing that first post, I just disappeared.. First I was waiting for that bolt of inspiration to strike me as it used to when I was more regular with my writings. My mind would suddenly be filled with thoughts that I just had to write down.. no matter what the time of the day or night. But no such luck this time. Just goes to show how much tuning up my grey cells need.
And then I was on bed rest( Dr.’s Orders) I thought- Hmm now that I am on the bed.. not doing anything..I will be filled with so many thoughts,the thinker that i am and that will help me take my blog ahead. I even kept a pen and notepad on my bedside table for just that reason. Grrrrrrrr.. again no such luck.
So,Now I know.. That this beautiful mind of mine.. which i let degenerate.. will not start working on its own. If I want it to be as it was.. or even better.. I will need to revive it,to rejuvenate it.So, Here’s to a new beginning.
New beginnings remind me of spring time. Its already spring time here. This morning i was woken up by beautiful sunshine filtering through fresh green baby leaves. Ohh!! They are so beautiful, so fresh and pure. I didn’t expect to see any spring here in Arizona. We didn’t see much of winter.. and so i figured how different could spring be. But I am pleasantly surprised.. Spring is still spring.. fresh, full of new things.. new beginnings.
And This Spring is extra special for me..as it marks the beginning of a new phase of my life. Soon I will have my little munchkin with me..So pure,innocent. The look that a new mom exchanged with her new baby always filled me with awe… and soon I will be able to experience that. It makes me excited, nervous, emotional, impatient, happy, overwhelmed all at the same time.Its so strange to be soo involved with someone you havent even seen.I guess the fact that this lil being is in you for the last so many months and that you can feel its every small movement, makes it so real even before it being born. See you soon, My Angel! -
Here’s my very first post for my very first Blog.
And as I sit here, trying to write something, my mind fails to help me. My thoughts seem to have abandoned me. And all those ideas which I thought would come pouring out of my mind, on to the screen, are all gone!!!
I will start with telling you- I am at a beautiful stage in my life.. Standing on the brink of motherhood..I cant wait to hold my lil bundle of Love, who’ll be here with us in just about 6 weeks.When I found out that I am pregnant.. or even before I got pregnant,I had decided to document my pregnancy.When I found out that I am pregnant,I kept thinking -“OH I have so many months to do that.. there’s still time”.. and now i realise that the time has just slipped out of my hands.. and here i am struggling to put all my feelings, all my emotions in words.. and I thought I was good with words!OH Well,That is Life.. Or is it the Hormones???
